The Scars That Define Us Read online

  “It’s an untraceable pistol, so don’t get caught with it,” he says, smiling. “Here is how you turn the safety off.” He clicks a button on the side and looks at me to see if I understood what he just did. He then pulls the top of it back, making a loud clicking noise. “And this is how you load it,” he instructs, handing it back to me.

  “Never aim at someone unless you have every intent of killing them,” he says seriously. “I’ll try and get you to the shooting range to shoot sometime.” He sits back down on the floor where I was sitting moments before.

  I eye the gun placed in my hand. It makes me nervous holding it, but I feel powerful with it. I hold another’s fate in my hands with this gun.

  I put the safety back on and place the pistol on the counter for now.

  “I can’t believe you skipped the party to stay and mingle with my lame ass,” I tell him, downing another shot. I wince from its brutal assault in my throat, gaining a laugh from Bobby.

  “Gah, I’m going to regret this in the morning,” I say, smacking my lips. I can feel the numbness creeping up the sides of my mouth from the alcohol, letting me know it is taking effect.

  “My mom always had a saying: No regret in life, no fear in love.” His face lights up as he speaks. He holds a shot glass in a toast before tossing the amber liquid back.

  “Your mom?” I ask.

  “Yeah, she and my pops passed away in a car crash a while back,” he says sadly.

  “I’m sorry to hear that, Bobby. Were you guys close?”

  Bobby nods. “Very. My pops would say, ‘live life to the fullest and never see anything as a regret, but as a lesson. That when you love, love shamelessly and not with fear.’ So eventually, my pops would say, ‘no regret in life,’ and my mom would chime in, ‘no fear in love’,” Bobby says, his lips curved in a smile.

  “But we are here to celebrate, Firefly. Now, drink up,” he orders, handing me another shot.

  I hold it up. “No regret in life. No fear in love,” I chant as I swish it back and yelp at the burn gliding down my throat. My body is starting to hum, and I feel my body temperature rise. I watch Bobby pull his shirt off as he is starting to feel the alcohol take effect and make him warm, as well. He struts over to the stereo and turns on some music. Justin Timberlake swoons through the speakers as Bobby slides to the left, his hand cupping his jean-clad crotch as he sings with the music. I can’t help but laugh at him. Seeing a man as muscled as Bobby, covered in tattoos, dancing to Justin Timberlake is a sight to be seen, but damn if Bobby doesn’t pull it off, he looks very alluring in my buzzed state of mind.

  “Come on, Firefly. Get up and dance with me,” he beckons, holding his hand out. I jump up in my giddiness and start singing with him, but my words are slurred and my feet stumble. His hands claim my hips as we dance to the music.

  Four shots and three beers later, I’m smashed. Bobby, who has had way more than me, is even more wasted. He turns and pulls a brown wooden box from under the couch after tossing an empty beer bottle randomly across the floor.

  “What’s that?” I slur, my vision starting to blur. Actually, it’s been a little fuzzy for a while, now that I think about it.

  “This?” he slurs back.

  I nod heavily.

  He opens the lid, and I have to stare closely because of my blurry vision. I see a blue and white swirled glass pipe and a baggy containing what I think is weed.

  “Ever tried it, Firefly?” he asks, packing the glass with the green stuff from the baggy.

  “No.” I shake my head, making the room spin. I close my eyes hoping when I open them, everything is still.

  He lights the little glass and sucks in the smoke from the other end. “Here,” he says, his voice high-pitched from holding the smoke.

  “Uh, I’ve never done drugs before. I don’t know,” I hesitate, nibbling on my bottom lip.

  “If you don’t want to, I won’t force you,” he says calmly, letting out a puff of smoke.

  “What if my job has drug testing?” I slur.

  Bobby almost chokes on the smoke he’s holding. “Nah, I doubt it,” he laughs. “Mila dips her fingers in a lot worse than pot.”

  I have never tried weed, but I always wanted to. What do I have to lose? I grab the glass pipe and inhale deeply.

  “There you go, Firefly. Let your freak flag fly,” he chuckles.

  I hold the smoke in my lungs, feeling the burn rise slowly. It’s harsh on my lungs and feels like fire in my throat, making me exhale its earthy smoke. I start choking, the burn in my throat not letting up.

  “That was a pretty big hit,” he says, putting the things back in the box.

  “Is that bad?” I ask, still coughing.

  “Nah, but you’re probably going to be high as a kite,” he slurs.

  I sit back, my body feeling light and dizzy. I feel my drunken state rise from the effects of the weed, making it hard not to throw up or pass out. I close my eyes and try to focus on where I’m sitting, mentally telling myself the room isn’t spinning. I drown in the effects of feeling like I’m floating on a pool of clouds and dive into blackness. My numb body falls forward with a hard hit, but I don’t have it in me to give a damn.

  I WAKE UP TO the sunlight blaring into the living room. I’m lying on the couch with a blanket thrown over me. I pull myself into a sitting position and moan from the pain riddling through my shoulder. When I look over, I notice a good-sized bruise.

  “You did that when you passed out last night,” Bobby says. I peer up and see him leaning against the doorframe. His blond hair is wet and his chest is bare; the only thing he’s wearing is a white towel wrapped around his waist.

  “My head hurts just as bad,” I croak. I smack my lips together and swallow; my mouth feels dry and sticky.

  “Here, drink this,” Bobby orders, sitting a glass full of red liquid on the coffee table.

  “What the hell is that?” I ask, pointing to the glass.

  “Your hangover remedy. Drink it, shower, and you’ll feel better,” he states, laughing.

  I reach over and grab the cold glass. I sniff it and smell tomato and lemon. I gag instantly.

  Bobby chuckles and walks down the hall.

  I take a deep breath and try to take a sip. As soon as the cool liquid hits my mouth, I feel vomit rise in my throat. I get up and take off toward the bathroom, running past Bobby to get to it.

  ***

  It’s my first day at my new job and I love it. The little girls are so cute. I tell them to do a position and they just twirl and ask if they look like a princess. I can’t help but laugh and twirl with them. Thankfully, I don’t have a hangover and feel okay to spin. Bobby had to feed the red remedy juice to me sip by sip this morning, but he got it down me and I started feeling better.

  “Aren’t you a little too old to be a sugar plum fairy?”

  I turn from the little dancing girls and see a gentleman dressed in a very expensive-looking suit. He has short, light-brown hair and vibrant, brown eyes, a chiseled jaw and thick lips. His arms are lean, and his frame looks a little muscled but not by much.

  “Excuse me?” I ask, my head tilted.

  “I’m Kelsey’s father, Parker,” he says, running his hands through his hair with a grin. His tone is smooth and accented.

  “I’m Dani,” I smile.

  “Is that short for Danielle?” he asks with a handsome grin.

  “Yes, it is.”

  Parker eyes me from head to toe in my leotard; his chocolate eyes taking in everything, making me bite my bottom lip uncomfortably.

  “Well, Danielle, I’d love to have dinner with you sometime,” Parker says, his tone flirty and his dark eyes intimidating. He walks to his daughter Kelsey and grabs her hand.

  “I don’t know—”

  “Don’t think of it as a date. Just a night to enjoy yourself,” Parker interrupts, walking up to me. His stride is precise and calculated his tone deep and reassuring. It would be nice to go out and get Shadow off my mind, a
long with the club. Looking at the way things are going with the club and the fact that there is no sign of me gaining their trust, I should think about moving on. I look down at Kelsey who is spinning back and forth, as her dad holds her hand firmly.

  “That sounds great,” I say with a hard swallow.

  “Perfect,” he exclaims, his mouth turning upward into a gorgeous smile. He slides his hand along the side of his head, smoothing down his hair trying to curl just above his ear.

  “Where should I pick you up?”

  I walk over to the desk, write down the address of the apartment, and hand it to him.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow at eight, Danielle.” He leans in and pecks my cheek lightly. I can’t help but smell his scent of mint and aftershave as he leans back.

  He winks at me and leaves as Bobby is walking in.

  “Who is that douchebag?” Bobby inquires loudly, not caring if Parker or the little girls hear him.

  “A night out,” I say, raising my eyebrow.

  “No shit?” Bobby asks, stepping back toward the door to get another look at Parker. “The fucker has money.”

  I step over to the door and look out. Parker and his daughter are climbing into a nice black, sleek-looking car.

  “His name is Parker, and it’s just a night out,” I say, reassuring myself that it’s nothing more.

  “That is an Aston Martin, very expensive,” Bobby states, tapping his knuckles on the glass. “What do you see in that prick?” he asks, his tone laced with revulsion.

  Looking at Parker, he would be any girl’s fantasy. He’s handsome, appears to be a gentleman, and seems intelligent. Why I am not sold on the idea has me puzzled.

  “I don’t know,” I whisper against the window, my breath fogging the glass as I breathe against it.

  I feel Bobby staring at me, but I don’t look. I just watch Parker leave the parking lot, wondering what the hell I’m thinking.

  “It’s good for you to get out. I’m sure you’ll have fun,” Bobby remarks, his hand patting my back. His encouragement to get back out there has me pulling from the glass and looking at him a little shocked.

  ***

  I settle for a red dress with a high neckline, the hem stopping just above my knee. Shadow bought it for me on our trip; he said I would look sexy as hell in red. I sigh. Tonight is to forget about Shadow, to just forget about the pain. I hear knocking come from the door, so I grab my silver heels and slip them on as I make way to answer it.

  “She’s not ready,” I hear Bobby say in the living room, his voice cold and dripping with hatred.

  “All right,” Parker drawls out.

  “I’m here,” I say, rushing into the room.

  “Danielle, you look stunning,” Parker exclaims, his hands reaching for me. He palms my hand and turns it over, kissing the top of it gently.

  “You look handsome, Parker,” I say in return. He has his short, brown hair gelled back, and he’s dressed in a grey suit which hugs his shoulders well.

  “Where are you taking her?” Bobby asks, standing closely, his eyes stabbing Parker. Bobby’s muscled body takes over the room, making Parker look small in comparison. Looking at Parker, I’m not sure he has any muscle now.

  “Um,” Parker hesitates. I can tell he is just as pleased with Bobby as I am. I raise an eyebrow at Bobby, my look of death trying to tell him to cut the fatherly bullshit out.

  “I’m taking her to the Short Vine,” Parker states, tugging me toward the door, his tone heavy with irritation.

  Bobby scoffs as he sits back on the leather couch. “Of course you are,” Bobby says, his tone unreadable.

  I can see Parker puff out in anger.

  “Let’s go,” I tell him. If I don’t get us out of here, I know for a fact Bobby will cause problems.

  “Yes. Let’s,” Parker says, eyeing Bobby with a raised eyebrow.

  “Have a good night,” Bobby sings, his blue eyes trailing Parker as we walk out the door.

  As we make it out front to the pretty black car, I can literally feel the anger vibrating off Parker.

  “Are those the type of people you hang out with?” Parker asks, his tone dripping with disgust. I stop before reaching for the door handle and look at him. ‘Those people’ he’s talking about are my family, but I can see why he thinks Bobby is some kind of animal. I once used to think the same thing.

  “They aren’t bad once you get to know them,” I say with a kind smile.

  Parker smiles and opens the car door for me.

  I climb into the expensive leather seat, it surrounds my body like a glove as Parker shuts the passenger door. A console sits between the driver’s seat and my own, filled with a shifter and lots of controls. Seconds later, Parker climbs behind the wheel. His chocolate eyes take me in from head to toe, making my cheeks warm.

  “Beautiful,” Parker says, shaking his head like he can’t believe it.

  When we arrive at the restaurant, I feel out of place instantly. Just by looking at the place on the outside, it looks elegant and classy. There are vines sweeping over the patio where couples are eating outside, hiding them from the public’s eye. The door is glowing with little light bulbs, which surround its entry, giving off just enough light to see the sand-stoned walkway. When we enter, the lighting is dim and there are racks of crystal and wine bottles elegantly placed for display with a bar set off to the right and women and men surrounding it. We are seated right away by a young lady dressed in a black cocktail dress with gold bangles. She doesn’t speak; she just smiles and eyes Parker like dessert. She shows us our table and flashes Parker a knowing smile.

  “You come here a lot?” I ask, watching the girl look over her shoulder at Parker as she returns to her podium.

  “Uh, sometimes,” Parker says, stumbling on his words. The table is classy with a white tablecloth and a little tea light in the middle, giving off a romantic energy. A waiter dressed to impress in a black tux hands us menus before bowing and walking away. This place is overkill and makes me feel extremely underdressed. I start tapping my foot, feeling anxious and uncomfortable, and open the menu. My eyes widen and I nearly have a heart attack at the prices. Parker gives a light chuckle at the expression on my face. “Order whatever you would like, Danielle.” I smile lightly and look for the cheapest thing on the menu; money doesn’t impress me. After we have ordered and are sipping on some very tasty wine, I look up at Parker who is staring at me intently. I swallow the gulp of dark wine and smile nervously.

  “You are very beautiful, Danielle. Has anyone told you that?” Parker asks. I swirl the wine in my glass, looking at the dark-purple tides slam alongside the crystal.

  “Yes they have,” I whisper. Shadow comes to mind, taking me from the expensive dinner meant to impress me to mine and Shadow’s first date. He made sandwiches and brought me to the beach; I love the beach. It was way better than this. I shake my head of Shadow and drink the rest of my wine.

  During dinner, I learn Parker has a successful career as a lawyer, his car is his baby, and that he’s recently divorced. Finally, after paying the check, we head back to his fancy car. As I reach for the door, Parker grabs my hand with force, pulling it away from the door handle.

  “Let me,” he says smoothly, his body so close to mine I can feel the heat coming off him. He opens the door but holds it so I can’t enter.

  “Are you in a rush to get away from me?” he whispers into my ear.

  I don’t say anything because I can’t. My heart is beating so fast, and my palms are beginning to sweat. His eyes are hooded and marked with lust, telling me he wants me for dessert. He tucks his thumb under my chin and brings my head up and I try to pull from his grasp, but he tightens his grip on my chin painfully. He presses his lips to mine softly before letting me go and opening the passenger door.

  “Holy shit,” I mutter. I thought this wasn’t supposed to be a date, but it really feels as if it is. This is too fast.

  ***

  He drives through traffic, preci
sely following all the traffic laws. He reaches his perfectly manicured hand over and laces it around mine.

  “I can see something is holding you back from me, Danielle, and that’s perfectly all right. I will wait,” he says, giving my hand a light squeeze before placing it back on the wheel.

  “You don’t know anything about me,” I retort, looking out the window. How can a guy wait for someone he knows nothing about?

  “I look forward to knowing you better,” he says, chuckling. I take my eyes from the window and look at him, a little shocked.

  He takes his eyes from the road and looks at me, his chocolate eyes staring deeply into mine.

  “You have the greenest eyes I have ever seen, Danielle,” Parker declares sincerely as he takes in my face. I pull my gaze from his and look out the window. When Shadow witnessed my green eyes for the first time, he was shocked. Having vibrant colored eyes like my father, giving away that his president and I were related, scared the shit out of Shadow. The memory makes me smile.

  We pull up outside Bobby and Shadow’s apartment, the sexy car that purrs as you accelerate coming to a low hum before he turns the engine off.

  “I had a great time tonight, Danielle. I haven’t been out much since my divorce. I would love for you to join me for lunch. Give me the opportunity to get to know you better,” he says, rubbing the side of my face with his soft fingers. I turn my head and look into his dark eyes. This hurts, being here with another guy, one who is anything but Shadow. Where Shadow is rough, Parker is smooth. Shadow has a colorful vocabulary, where Parker’s is very mannered and educated. They are black and white. I look out the window and up at the apartment before looking back at Parker. It’s lunch; what could it hurt? Having lunch with Parker, I know I don’t have to worry about being dragged to some isolated location and having my mouth sewn shut for being a rat. He’s safe.

  “Ya, sure.”

  “How about tomorrow?” Parker asks eagerly.

  “Sure,” I respond, opening the car door.